Dan Chiarello - an unpublished UK-based writer
dannyk87@hotmail.com
THE JOURNEY
CHAPTER 1
baz rolled over farted and thought about what he would do today he looked over
at the ashtray next to the bed and the half smoked spliff that sat neatly inside
and then his first decision of the day ,well the way he looked at it he had
three choices:
1. jump out of bed like a spring gazelle, take a shower and set about tidying the
shit hole he called home.
2. get up, phone his boss apologise profusely and get to work asap
3.light the spliff and see what happens next (as if he didn't know)
he sat bolt upright as if he was going to jump into action. he debated whether to
go to the phone or the shower first, he couldn't make up his mind so he thought
fuck it" i will have a little smoke and then decide" ,he grabbed the spliff and
lay back down flicked his lighter into action and took a long pull ..ahhhh bliss
he thought as he took another puff. he reached across nearly falling from his
bed switched on the stereo ,it fired into action within a second and a long slow
hum of bass drifted out of the speakers that were piled up like cardboard boxes
in the corners opposite his bed . after three quarters of an hour, half a spliff
and short wank he was hungry and his mouth felt like he had been licking dry
concrete. he had to get up. he fell out of bed and made his way across the room
catching his little toe on the corner of the bedstead he danced around in agony
for minute then limped into the bathroom. he urinated then looked intently into
the mirror "i look terrible" he thought his eyes half closed and his face
scrunched up as the light seemed unusually bright forgetting that he was stoned. he
scratched his short brown hair then brushed his teeth and walked into the
kitchen . the heat was nearly unbearable he stood in the doorway and looked in
amazement the room was a complete mess from the session the night before and his
best friend and house mate cobweb was crashed out on the kitchen table cuddling
the remnants of a can of extra strong beer he looked at the electric cooker it
seemed to be on fire, a closer examination proved that every ring was burning
red all full on, "oy cob you dickhead, you could have burnt the house down man"
no response not even a murmur from cob, baz reached over and tugged hard on one
of cobs ginger dreadlocks his head dropped from his arm and clonked on the table
, "owwww man what's up" he grumbled " are you trying to fucking kill us, you left
the bloody cooker on all night dickhead" baz shouted "well it was cold man,
what's
the time anyway" cob dribbled slowly lifting his head "half twelve "baz replied
as he put the kettle on and searched in the greeny brown water of the sink for
some cups "Fuck" cob screamed as he jumped off the table cobweb was a tall
scraggly dressed monster of a man he was huge , the type of person that people
would cross the road to get away from, his dreadlocks nearly touched his belt
and he was always in need of a bath but despite his size he was terribly timid
and wouldn't say boo to a goose. "skin up then will ya as i'm making the teas" baz
said as he pulled the second cup from the sink and poured out the slime that it
contained. "we were supposed to meet one arm at twelve o clock" cob said quietly
baz`s hand fell to his sides he knew there and then that they were in
trouble, the colour drained from his face and he felt sick, he turned and sat
down cob was quietly rolling a spliff from the last of the dope . "right i'm
calling a board meeting "said cob "where's that tea" he prompted baz got up as
the kettle clicked off and finished making the drink he brought the teapot and
two cups over and grabbed the milk from the fridge sat down and sighed. "what
the fuck are we going to do" baz said ,"we owe one arm pete nearly two thousand
pounds and we only have 300 not only that but we have just messed up any chance
of getting out of this without broken bones" cobweb seemed to be concentrating
on rolling the spliff and didn't reply in fact baz didn't know if he even heard
him. "oy are you fucking awake yet man do you know who this is "baz started
getting angry at no response from cob "this is pete ,you know one arm pete the
person we owe about two grand, the same person as we we were supposed to meet
twice before and didn't turn up, you know pete who said its our last chance at
twelve noon monday"
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one arm pete as he was called was a gangster, a drug dealer and an all round
phsyco ,baz and cob both knew what he was capable of when one day after a party
they and 2 others were sat at stuart's house a local dope dealer ,they were sat
round an old gas fire playing cards for a loser to make the tea and sticking
knives under the flame until they were burning red then they dropped pieces of
hash onto the burning knives and inhaling the smoke through an old wine bottle
with a hole in bottom . they were all terribly wasted not only from the dope but
also from the concoction of e,coke and a touch of acid from the night before. they
were arguing who was going to make the tea as usual when all of a sudden the
front door crashed open and in came pete swinging a short length of scaffold
tube he was screaming "where's my fucking money" stuart sank down in his chair
pete swung the metal tube straight through the telly ,then the music stopped as
the stereo was next. stuart was trying to make a run for it when the scaffold
tube hit the side of his knee it sent him reeling to the floor he was trying to
crawl away when pete place a well aimed kick to the side of his face which spun
him over he then changed his grip on the tube and proceeded to stab the tube at
stuart's mouth knocking out his front teeth in the process.
"do you want to end up like stuart or that other whatshisname that got on the
wrong side of pete" baz was shouting now "listen for fucks sake calm down" cob
swung the now rolled and smoking spliff to baz baz took a puff and then buried
his head in his hands. "what the fuck are we going to do man ,we are fucked for
sure when he finds us" "but he doesn't know where we live" cob piped up "how long
do you think it will take before he leans on somebody hard enough and they let
him know where we are " baz answered cob knew he was right it was only a matter
of time before their door came crashing in and pete with the famous scaffold
tube in hand or worse still, whatshisname had his head blown off all down to the
one arm bandit, as he liked to be called . "well we got to get out of here man"
cob started " no shit man " baz said sarcasticly baz counted up in his head "we
have only got three hundred quid maybe we can make it to four hundred and
twenty" if we sell my stereo and your mini disc player. " but where will we go
though" cob said sadly baz`s thoughts were now hazed by the dope and he couldn't
really think of where they could go with four hundred and twenty pounds his mind
wandered to places afar to tropical jungles and lush beaches with scantily clad
beach babes serving his every need, to adventure and new experiences and most of
all new types of dope. he had heard of mexico and south america had good dope
there was colombian they also had coke too, there would be plenty of adventures
there he thought. "oy are you going to smoke all of that you greedy bastard "
cob ruined his daydream " oh sorry bout that" cob apologised handing over the
last bit of spliff" i didn't realize you know, it was helpin me think" "yeah well
we ain't got anymore now that was the last" there was a slight look of desperation
in cobwebs eyes this hit home to baz he felt bad after all it was his fault that
cob had been involved in this deal with pete he had convinced cob to go halfs on
nine ounces of the highest quality ganja,but it turned out to be too good and
they ended up smoking the majority and hardly selling any. baz even took two
weeks sick from his job at the local meat factory to smoke it. they always
intended to go out and sell some to their friends but it was too good and they
couldn't be bothered to leave the house. a couple of hours passed and they talked
about where they would go if they had the money and how they could get away from
the one armed bandit, what they could do to rectify the situation ,but they both
knew there was nothing they could do they had to get away as soon as possible.
they decided to go out sell what they could and meet back at the house later
baz walked down the local pub to see if he could sell his stereo he walked in
the queens arms ordered himself a pint and a packet of peanuts and walked over to
the duke box and started looking through the selection of music. he was engrossed
in reading a track listing for 70`s music when he felt a tap on the shoulder he
froze and expected the worst he slowly turned around fully expecting to be face
to face with a scaffold pole ,but to his surprise it was his ex girlfriend
louisa he stared at her for an instant and at once he knew he still loved her. louisa
was the girl he wanted to marry she was perfect in every way. her family had
moved to england from venezuela when she was a child that accounted for her
latin looks those big brown eyes made baz want to take her in his arms and kiss
her tenderly but he knew that it wasn't possible anymore they had been together
for 6 months but she dumped him because of his drug habits saying that drugs had
killed her brother back venezuela and she didn't want to see anyone who was
involved in this lifestyle ,baz had managed to keep his drug taking a secret when
they started to see each other but over time louisa put two and two together and
one day walked in to the bathroom on purpose to catch him out and found him
snorting cocaine from the toilet seat her temper had flared and she called him
every name under the sun slapped him and walked out that was the last he really
saw of her nearly a year ago now. he had seen her her a couple of times but
never had the chance to speak she wouldn't let him as she would be gone before he
even came near, and yet now she was here stood in front of him looking at him
waiting for him to speak. "mmmmmm hi louisa" baz said trying not to sound stoned
"hola barry" she said with her distinctly latin spanish accent ,when they had
been together they used to speak in spanish, baz`s mother was from spain and she
taught him spanish before he even learnt english. "hows it going i haven't seen
you for ages "baz started "i have been busy " she replied "besides i have been
keeping away from you" she was always so direct it was one of the things he
liked about her but now it made him feel nervous. "oh well er do you want a
drink or something " "no thanks, i just thought id say hello i was just leaving"
baz looked over and saw her freinds waiting at the door all staring intently at
him this made him feel even more stoned and nervous. "hummm well hello "he said
sheepishly "are you stoned "louisa asked drawing closer and looking into his
eyes by now he was completely paranoid the woman he loved was merely inches from
him he knew he was stoned and that his eyes were red as a london bus. "err no"
he tried explain but he was too late "you don't fucking change" she hissed "i
thought that you were the best barry when we were first together we have so many
good time but then i find you lie you treat me like a fool" "but louisa " he
wanted to be anything else but stoned "oh barry you will never change i wanted
to see you again maybe try again but no you fucking drug addict i never want to
see you ever "with that she strode toward her friends "but louisa i love you" he
shouted after her she turned and looked at him "FUCK YOU" she screamed back then
left baz just stood there and looked at the door she just walked through for a
moment he wanted to go after her but then a friendly face popped in front of his
it was ricky an old mate and one of his team of friends "allo geeza ,don't worry
about her must be the time of the month" he joked "come and have a sit down son"
and with that he grabbed baz`s arm and sat him down at a table in the corner. it
was when baz sat down that he suddenly cheered up a little at the table were
daryl and phil two brothers and four giggling girls sat opposite, phil leant over
and said let me introduce you this is laura, kate ,naomi and linda. baz suddenly
felt better and after 8 pints four tequilas and a few lines of coke in the
toilets he had completely forgot about louisa .he managed to sell his stereo to
daryl for slightly more than the sixty quid he expected, eighty quid would be
just fine .
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he awoke at around eleven the next day with a banging hangover he dressed and
went to the kitchen he put the kettle on and then he realized it was awfully
quiet he went up to cobs room to see if he was in he opened the door the room
was its usual flea pit with spray painted walls a mattress on the floor amongst
a collection of beer cans and skateboard magazines but no cobweb. he walked
downstairs back to the kitchen and let the dirty green/brown water out of the
sink and started making an effort to clean up. then he heard the bang of the
bathroom door and the toilet flushing "cob must have slept in the toilet" he
thought to himself he was in the middle of shouting to see if cob had made any
money when he came in the room ,but to his surprise it wasn't cob standing in the
doorway it was a woman with only minimal clothing on "oh my fucking god who the
hell is this "he thought then he remembered the face it was kate from the pub
,the events of the previous night all started flooding back to him he had been
slightly drunk and ended up sat next to kate (who he soon found out was on speed
after she talked non stop without drawing breath) but as the night grew on they
had got on quite well (especially after baz got on the charlie ) . his heart
beat a little faster when he thought about the fantastic sex they had had when
she came back with him last night. "well arnt you going to say good morning
baby" kate asked sexily baz was stood with his mouth wide open she was wearing
only a little pair of panties and one of his old skateboard tshirts he thought
that he always hated that shirt but it looked damn fine especially with kate's
ample breast inside it! "mm mm mmorning kate" he stammerd "are you making
coffee" she suggested looking at the kettle "mmmm yea you want..." he still
couldn't keep his eyes from her voluptuous shape "of course, silly" she giggled "
i'm going to take a shower "and with a little shake of her behind she was gone
upstairs back to the bathroom
baz was still in shock when cob strolled in grinning like a cheshire cat "hey
dude she's got a lovely ass" "yes mate and she knows how to work it too" baz
laughed "what are you so happy about anyway old chap" baz said putting on an
aristocratic accent "well my ol matey i've found the cure to our little problem"
cob said triumphantly this statement from cob distracted baz`s thoughts of kate
and their passionate sex from the night before. "well you had better make this
good mate as we have to be out of here by tomorrow at least" baz commented
hoping cob has had some extraordinary luck "yes mate check this out,i sold my
mini disc for 90 quid to this kid in the shopping centre" cob said with pride
baz did some quick calculations in his head , "well that's 470 quid we have all
together, listen mate i don't mean to piss on your bonfire but that is not going
to get us to mexico" baz said with slight disappointment "that's not all
man" cobweb butted in "well what else then man" baz said hopefully "i got this"
baz threw a brown paper parcel about the size of a packet of crisps onto the
table baz looked at cob in amazement "you better had not spent the last of our
cash on more dope" baz said almost in desperation "well this is not just any old
dope this is fucking rocket fuel full on blow your fucking face off with a
shotgun dope" cob explained with glee baz covered his eyes with his hands "cobweb
my friend" baz started "yesterday i gave you the three hundred quid to look
after please tell me that you still have three hundred" baz was
surprisingly
calm, he thought that must that he had sex last night so that must have given
him a more mature approach to the fact that cob may well have wasted all the
three hundred quid on" super dope" "well mate i actually had three hundred and
ninety quid but i bought this gear" cob said as he picked up the package and
waved it in baz`s face "mate please tell me you still have the three hundred" baz
repeated "how the fuck can i have three hundred when i spent 280 on the finest
quality ganja you have ever set eyes on" cob stated matter of factly baz lost
his temper there and then "you fucking idiot now we don't have a fucking bean to
get out of here with ,thats it we are done for ,you idiot we`ve only got one
hundred and ninety quid between us"then he remembered that he spent seventy quid
the night before, "oops" he thought i wont bring that up yet " what the fuck have
you got to say for yourself then dick brain" baz said angrily cob looked
shocked and surprised at baz`s outburst and continued to put up a defence of how
good the dope was just when baz was about to launch into more fireworks kate
waltzed in looking and smelling beautiful she wore a baggy pair of tracksuit
pants and a tight fitting white t shirt with her blonde hair tied back into a
pony tail despite her attire she still managed to look sexy baz and cob
instantly forgot about all money problems and were immediately engrossed in kate
as she whisked around the kitchen looking in the cupboards "hasn't that kettle
boiled yet" she chirped "oh yea sorry i forgot " baz replied as he jumped up and
turnt the kettle on .cob jumped up too "this place needs a tidy up i think" cob
announced as he began to scurry round sorting the rubbish "ooooohhh what's is this
" kate said as she picked up the bag of dope from the table "just a bit of dope"
baz and cob said at the same time .cob frowned at baz " well seeing as you two
are handling the kitchen i will handle this ,got any rizla????"she said happily.
about 3 hours later they sat in the lounge relaxing ,they were listening dub
reggae and cob was rolling another joint , kate was laying on baz`s knees . they
were all very stoned on the grass that cob bought and arguing about the best way
to make hash cake when kate said "so where the fuck did you get this weed it is
very nice ,heavy you know " baz growled partly because he was so stoned that he
couldn't speak and partly because kate reminded him that cob had spent £280 on
dope ,he pondered on this for a moment and then smiled to himself when he
remembered how great this weed was. "i got this from mikey ,i was walking down
grange road when this car pulled up and out jumped mikey swinging this bag" cob
held up the bag as proof. this prompted baz to cut in" i cant believe you bought
that much though man, you know weve got grief and need the money" "what grief?
what do you mean ? are you in trouble ?" kate piped sounding worried cob looked
at baz and began to tell kate the situation in great detail much to baz`s dismay
"oh my god" kate said "ive heard of that one arm chap, i heard that he shot that
guy whatshisname in the head" she exclaimed "yeah thats why we have gotta leave
soon, for awhile you know till things blow over" cob replied kate turned and
looked at baz momentarily " we will have a job to do that though we have only
120 quid" baz smiled "120 i thought it was 190" said cob inquisitively "well
yeah i spent a bit last night" baz said quietly "and there you are having ago at
me" cob whined " oh well it doesen't matter now" kate interrupted " the problem is
how are we going to get away from here" kate quizzed baz and cob looked at each
other then at kate "listen kate " baz started "if you stay here with us then you
will be at risk and that isn't right "baz said worriedly "well thanks babe for
looking out for me but i have had a bad run of luck and you guys seem ok to hang
with" she looked for approval at baz then cob. baz looked at cob ,then cob
shrugged his shoulders "well we had better have a celebratory spliff" cob
announced they spent the rest of the night smoking weed and making jokes almost
blind to the predicament that they were in .
the next day around eleven o`clock baz stumbled down the stairs in to the
kitchen, kate met him with a big hug and kiss and to baz`s surprise cob was
already up and sat at the table smoking a spliff and drinking coffee. kate
placed a another cup full in front of baz after he had sat down and asked when
they would be moving on . "well it has to be today i think we have to go
someplace a bit more safer" baz said sleepily they lived on the outskirts of
london in a terraced house it was a fairly quiet street that morning until there
was a loud bang at the door baz woke up rapidly and quickly dashed into the hall
to see what the noise was. to his horror it was who he expected one armed pete
was trying to shoulder barge his way through the front door after one failed
attempt fortunately for baz, cob and kate . baz ran back in to the kitchen shutting
the hall door and wedging his cricket bat under the handle to try and slow one
arm a little. cob`s eyes were wide with fear " quick lets go down the alley "
baz whispered forcefully and gestured toward the back door.by this time one arm
was shouting at the top of his voice " oy you fuckers i gonna teach you not to
rip me off" then a loud gunshot echoed through the house he was in the front
door and steaming his way up the hall "where the fuck are ya, where's my fucking
money" he had two accomplices and sent them to check upstairs as he tried the
door to the kitchen , he kicked full strength against the lock area and the
cricket bat slipped, the door swung open. one arm saw the still hot coffee on the
table and the pungent smell of dope filled the room but there was no sign of baz
or cob,he saw that the back door was slightly ajar he ran out into the back
alley that ran parallel with terrace and shouted at the top of his voice "im
gonna fucking kill ya ,when i find ya you are fucking dead you hear fucking
dead"
baz looked worriedly at cob and kate ,they stood under a railway bridge not too
far from the terraced house but well hidden from sight " phew he sounded pissed
off " cob said quietly as he pulled out a joint from his jacket " no shit " kate
agreed "well you did say that we should go someplace a bit safer" she joked "yeah
well just wasnt expecting to go right that minute that's all" baz replied " so
where now " cob asked " were outa here man were outa here" baz replied with an
emphasised sigh they agreed that kate would go back to the house and salvage
what she could, baz would find somewhere to hideout for the time being and cob
would sort out some tickets to get them away. they would meet in the red lion pub
about eight o`clock.
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baz chose that particular pub for its clientele ,it was the typical quiet pub
never very busy and well hidden away. it was a favourite with old men playing
dominoes and the odd adultering couple. not the cleanest of places with its dirty
brown smoke stained walls, but its low lighting made it an ideal meeting place.
baz was the first to arrive he bought himself a pint and sat in an alcove tucked
out the way .he sat puffing on a cigarette when kate tumbled in dragging two
carrier bags she spotted baz and sauntered over trying not to look suspicious
,she gave baz a big kiss then sat down with a sigh of relief. "so you managed to
get some stuff together then , i take it with no problems " "well you wouldn't
believe what i had to go through to get these bags of rubbish " she gasped "why
what happened " "well there's little ol me strolling to your door when your little
friend pete jumped out of the bushes and grabbed me "she said calmly " no what
did he say"baz said worriedly "he asked who i was and what i wanted there " "i
told him that i was your ex and i just came by to pick up some things " "and did
he believe you" "of course, i spent about ten minutes slagging you off then he
just went off laughing and left me to it " "laughing! why? what did you tell him"
"told him that you were shit in bed ,had a little dick and that you had ran out
of good drugs" she grinned "but don't worry darling none of it was true you have
still got good drugs" she giggled as she ran her hand up his leg giving his
balls a playful squeeze. they sat there for a while drinking and waiting for
cobweb. baz had sorted out a place for them to stay at the house of phil and
daryl the two brothers,who baz had told him their situation and said that it
would only be for one night. they turned into the pub too about ten minutes
later with their two girlfriends laura and naomi the little quiet pub changed
slightly the next hour or so the alcohol started to flow and phil threw a a
little bag full of coke onto the table and they all tucked into it, the low
lighting and the ideal place of being tucked in an alcove enabled them to snort
lines straight from the table instead of slipping off sneakilly to the toilets
to intake. by ten thirty baz was looking at his watch wondering where cob had
got to when he strolled through the door smiling from ear to ear obviously very
very stoned he pulled up another stool and sat down . " well how did you get on
me ol matey , did you get some tickets sorted " baz asked "yeah man yeah i got
some ticket alright man we are more than sorted we are gonna go where ever we
want man" cob said so slowly that they thought he would fall asleep mid
sentence. he lent forward and propped his head in his hands . "thats great "kate said "so
where are we going to then "wherever you want man" cob repeated "what does that
mean then "baz asked " let me see the tickets, what are they for ..the train?"
cob slowly fished about in his jacket ,everybody sat silently in anticipation it
seemed as though the whole pub went quiet baz thought to himself. then finally
cob smiled "ahhh here they all are " he pulled out a ticket then another then
another and another this went on for a full twenty minutes with cob pulling
tickets from every pocket until there was a large pile on the table. there was
still silence when he had finished and everybody sat looking at each other in
amazement then kate picked a ticket up and shrieked "hey cob these are lottery
tickets, how many lottery tickets exactly did you buy for gods sake " "well i
went to the train station and we couldn't hardly get out of london with the money
we have so i thought what the fuck are we gonna do!!! so i went and sat on a
bench out side the station rolled a little number and sat and thought hard about
where we could go ,you know what i sat there for ages then all of a sudden i
noticed a poster for the lottery saying "this could be your lucky day" so that
was it i went to the news agents and bought one hundred tickets on lucky dip !!"
they all looked at each other and fell about laughing, well everybody but baz
who just banged his head on the table and looked at the floor.
"this was it" he thought he was in emotional turmoil the concoction of drink and
drugs with the news of cob`s unbelievable stupidity in buying lottery tickets had
a terrible effect on him he felt trapped in the life he had made for himself. baz had a bad start in life, his father had left him and his mother when he was
only 12 ,they had a hard life on the council estate in london and baz sometimes
wished he been bought up in the countryside away from all the pressures of
living in london he couldn't stand being surrounded by the grey buildings along
with the awful weather that england always had it made him depressed, also the
social pressures of having to live up to a certain standard to fit in whether it
was buying a new ralph loren shirt or getting a bag of drugs to fit in with all
of his mates. he was sick of this lifestyle it all seemed pointless at that
moment like he was banging his head against the wall by doing all the drugs, he
knew they didn't help him in fact deep down he knew that they made things worse
he would temporarily forget about all of his problems when he was out of his
head but they would come back ten fold when it was time to come down .but now it
was different he was out of his head and all his worries were still there it
made no difference now he couldnt escape into a world of drugs he had nowhere to
go he had to start to deal with his problems he had to face up to real life.
baz felt a pat on his shoulder he looked up and saw cob looking at him "hey man
are you ok, what's up you haven't said anything yet" cob said looking
hopeful baz
looked at him and he couldn't be angry in fact he had to smile when he saw the
state of cob he was filthy and his dreads contained spider webs obviously from
when they were under the railway bridge, his eyes were only little red slits he
looked terribly stoned. baz thought that really cob had the best idea even
though he could of got them tickets to somewhere just outside london he didn't. cob
went on the idea that it was pointless to just get just outside london (one arm
would find them he had some good connections with the london underworld), they
had to count on a bit of luck and cob didn't doubt that they did have just that.
it was five am and baz was sleeping on a mattress on the floor, it seemed like
he had only just fallen asleep when kate shook him roughly "baz ,baz ,baz wake
up " she wispered baz would have pretended not hear her and carry on sleeping
but there was a certain urgency in her voice "mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" baz
mumbled with his face buried in the pillow "look at this baz "she said shaking
him hard now. baz rolled over and opened one eye .kate was sitting bare naked
with the biggest smile on her face .he looked at her with interest staring at
her voluptuous body but he felt so tired and drained of energy, they had sex a
couple of hours before and baz simply could not summon up any more strength to
go for another round, kate had a ferocious sexual appetite and he knew it would
be at least another couple of hours before he had any chance of getting back to
sleep. "sorry kate i cant go again i'm knackered give me an hours sleep then i
will be more than ready" "no no no not me look at this "she said holding a
little slip of paper. baz reached out and took the paper for a closer inspection
he stared at it for a moment and realised he was looking at one of cobs lottery
tickets he looked at kate she was pointing to the television of which was on some
program showing the lottery numbers. baz read the numbers and checked them
against the ticket, his body spammed and he sat bolt upright and checked the
numbers twice more he read them out one by one and he had five numbers out of
six. he stared at kate in disbelief and he started shaking with excitement they
had won the lottery.
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baz and kate couldn't speak to each other they were just jumping up and down
in all their naked glory laughing like two crazed hyenas. even cob who had been
comatose in the biggest dope slumber started to stir he rolled over and took a
look to see what was happening "hey hey hey whatever kinky sex game you two are
doing can you keep the noise down" he blurted covering his eyes. kate and baz
grabbed one arm each and pulled cob straight up from the sofa on which he was
sleeping only moments ago. "whoa whoa whoa no im not into that at all its not my
thing man "cob said sounding scared and backing away shaking both hands at them
trying to fend them off and trying to avert looking at them too . " cob man look
at this man "baz said excitedly "no man im not like that man, your my friend but
that's as far as it goes" cob was starting to get worried now "no no this "baz
pushed the ticket into cobs hand cob looked down and seemed to study the ticket
for a moment then looked at baz who was still standing naked ,baz pointed at the
telly and the numbers on the screen , cob repeated baz`s initial reactions in
checking the numbers ,then a big beaming smile covered cobs face and he joined
in the laughing and started jumping around in his stripey boxer shorts. all the
commotion had caused laura daryls girlfriend to come down and see what the
commotion was she walked into the living room and took one look at baz, kate and
cob jumping around holding each other naked and backed out of the room shaking
her head. it seemed for ages that they all were jumping and laughing and after
they got themselves together and dressed they went into the kitchen and sat at
the table. " no way i cant believe it man "cob was saying over and over like a
stuck record "right well we have to phone up and see how much we have won " baz
said "whoa man what about the paparazzi " cob almost shouted "don't be silly
cobweb we are not film stars we just got second place in the lottery" kate
laughed "yeah but what if our name gets out and pete find out that we won all
that money" cob pointed out "all what money we haven't got any yet it might only
be one thousand pounds " baz said negatively "well i guess i should roll a
celebratory spliff " said cob" cos however much it is we have still won something
and in my eyes that needs celebrating" "here here" kate agreed and fished around
in the fridge and found some cans of lager ,passed one each to cob and baz and
opened hers "well i propose a toast "kate announced " to our good luck" "yeah and
here's to getting the fuck out of here too " cob added "mexico here we come "baz
shouted pushing his can of beer in the air. in the hours that passed they
organized when they could pick up the money and carried on drinking daryl and
phils fully stocked fridge till it was time to go and collect the money .by the
time it came around they were all very drunk and waltzed down the street to the
tube station arm in arm singing at the tops of voices . it was when they arrived
at the office they had to collect their money they had their first dilema :
"well who is going in then "kate asked looking at cob then baz "baz "cob said
sharply "no cob " "baz " "cob" "baz " "listen you two why don't you flip a coin"
kate suggested "good idea" they both said in stereo kate flipped and cobweb lost
"shit man, i knew that it would be me" cob said angrily and marched off into the
office muttering obscenities as he went cob web stepped inside and walked to the
counter where a receptionist was sat quietly ,she was a middle aged woman in her
early forties quite plump with the most enormous pair of breasts that cob had
ever seen that were accentuated by the low cut top that formed a cleavage that
you could park your bike in, "mmm morning darlin" cob started, he was still very
drunk and stunk of dope and lager but the woman didn't pay any attention "mmmmmmmm
scuse me " cob tried again but still no answer she was obviously ignoring
him.this was one of cobwebs pet hates and it spurred him to be a little more
straight forward "hello there mmm i couldn't help but notice what a lovely pair
you have " cob said cheekily the secretary looked up sharply and stared at cob
straight in the eyes "well you have though ,they look lovely in that top" he
said with a big smile "can i help you " she said finally " oh yes " cob answered
directly looking at her breasts "are you here for some kind of business" she
asked lowering her glasses cobweb was swaying quite unsteadily and held on to
the counter for support "yeah i am as it goes " he said coolly "i've won the
lottery" her face changed rapidly and she took off her glasses "ahh you must be
mr bradley who phoned this morning" she chirped "yep that's me " cobweb said with
a loud burp "oops scuse me i've been celebrating" "oh that's ok mr bradley i would
be too if i had won the lottery, mr dexter will be back in a couple of minutes he
will organize everything for you" " ok thanks, mmmmmm so err do you fancy helping
me celebrate a bit more later on " cobweb asked directly " well i don't know mr
bradley" answered the secretary blushing" im married but.." she stopped suddenly
when the door swung open " this is mr bradley " the secretary
announced to the
man who came in " ahhhh mr bradley its your lucky day" he said loudly as he
walked over to cob stretching out his hand "mmmmmmmm it was " cob said under his
breath mr dexter directed cob web into a large office and presented him with the
necessary paper work to read and sign and started through the normal procedure.
cob got bored quickly and blurted out " cut the bullshit dude how much did i win
" "well mr bradley you have won the sum of sixty five thousand pounds" he
announced cobweb roared with joy and began jumping around the room shaking his
fist in the air knocking over a small table with a vase of flowers and several
other things that unfortunately got in his way. a few minutes later when he had
calmed down a little he signed the paperwork and asked "so when do i get my
money then" "well we just have to take a photo for our record then you can have
the check" dexter replied dexter pushed the intercom and the receptionist came
in seconds later giving cobweb a smile and a wink as she walked past "yes mr
dexter" she asked "can you present the check to our winner here so i can take a
photograph" he said handing over a massive check about three feet long and one
and a half wide "can you stand over there mr bradley "directing cobweb to a open
area by the window. cob strolled over unable to walk straight. dexter signalled
the receptionist to join him ,she walked over to cob and stood in a pose to
present the check. "now mr bradley i want you to take the check in one hand and
face the camera and smile " cobweb did as he was told but he couldn't help his
free hand wandering up behind the big check and cupping her large breast giving
it a good squeeze ,she just looked at him smiling. "that's it mr bradley just one
more, thank you" after the receptionist had left mr dexter handed over a
considerably smaller check and one of the photo's then directed cob out of the
office cobweb walked past the reception towards the exit smiling at the
receptionist ,as he got to the exit mr dexter opened the door for him and he was
just stepping through when the receptionist called "mr bradley you forgot this"
she waved a flyer with the company details on .cob marched over ,as she handed
the paper to cob she leant over and whispered in his ear giving cob a good view
of her massive cleavage once more "call me between six thirty and seven tonight"
and with a wink she sat back down "goodbye mr bradley" "oh yer errr ok yea
thanks bye" cob stumbled and shuffled out the door glancing over his shoulder
then at the paper with a small piece of writing in the corner wich said brenda
followed by a number. as he stepped into the street he looked for baz and kate
who waiting across the road then he leapt from the top step waiving the check
screaming were rich were rich!!